One of my favorite things about cooking is making something that makes my family happy. My husband can be a tough food critic (and picky, did I ever mention picky?), so hearing my husband rave on how good something is, I know he being honest and it is gives me a good feeling knowing it was enjoyed. Sometimes, we also work together to bring a meal to the table and that’s rewarding as well. I’m lucky to be married to my best friend. I’m happy that we are together and are honest and open with each and can share these experiences together. Rob and I have known each other for over 16 years. But this post isn’t the story to talk about how we met or how we eventually started dating after many years of being friends – though that is a good story for another day. This post is to focus more on love itself and finding the person you want to spend your time with but with that love, also the acceptance from others that for some odd reason seem to go with it.
What got me thinking about this topic was the Golden Globes that were on last weekend and one of the stories I heard afterward. Right now, with all of us dealing with a global pandemic, it has forced us all to be flexible and think of new ways to still try to work together with others without being too close to one another. This was true for the awards show as well. Although I’m not really into watching the whole show, I do enjoy the highlights and seeing who won some of the categories afterwards. This year with the need for social distancing and using Zoom to connect actors all over the country, there proved to be a lot of interesting stories afterwards due to awkward moments and blips or glitches (who hasn’t been on a Zoom call and found themselves talking while muted?). One of the big stories was Jodie Foster accepting her award in her silk pajamas, sitting on the couch with her wife and their dog. To me, the big news, was they were in jammies and not the fancy gowns we have grown accustomed to seeing. Instead it was more focused on the fact that she was there with her wife and oh no, gave her a kiss! To me, the win was great news for her and I have always been a fan of her and her work. But what that moment highlighted to me was how people sometimes hide the ones they love if it may not be seen as acceptable. All this time, I never actually knew or I guess even realized that she was married nor did I know she had a wife. After some reading, I learned she did actually come out back in 2013, but again, to me, that should not be big news. I didn’t have to “come out” to my family when I introduced them to Rob. Knowing now though doesn’t change my opinions on her ability to act. And I mean, really, why would it? It’s sad to think that she would have to hide something like this out of fear of it affecting her career if people knew she was gay. It was great she was comfortable to share that loving moment now in 2021. But to me, that shouldn’t have to be a focus or even discussion. It should have just been a normal reaction that any couple shares in the excitement of one winning an award.
Honestly, I’ve never understood why people seem to think it’s their business in any way to judge anyone else’s relationship. If two people are in love and in a mutual/consensual relationship, who is it hurting? Back to myself and Rob… There is a 17 year gap between us. I know others with larger age gaps. Who cares right? But there are always those people that feel the need to comment or make judgment. Sorry, but it’s none of your business because age is just a number. I didn’t choose when I was born nor did Rob. But we are both consenting adults who are more than capable to make a decision about if we love and care about each other. The same holds true for those marrying someone of their same gender or of a different race or religion or whatever other difference that makes people feel the need to call it wrong. I would like to ask any person who feels the that they have the right to stick their nose in or even go as far as to try and pass laws saying that marrying the person you love illegal: how they would feel if they met someone and couldn’t be with them because someone else doesn’t like it? When people are born, they don’t get to decide when they are born or what ethnicity they are or even gender. They are who they are and they should not be punished if they grow up and fall in love with someone and enter in a relationship that makes someone else uncomfortable for it.
We need more love in this world. We need more kindness and understanding. As cheesy as that may sound, it’s true. And if you don’t understand something or have questions, ask. But don’t be a jerk and don’t judge. It doesn’t help anyone. It creates divides that are unnecessary. Oh and let’s not forget that all of that judgment and hate that people have against others, that is a choice. Hate and judgment are choices. And if you have your own kids or grandkids (or have any kind of influences over the younger generations), your hate and judging ways is something that they learn and pick up on. It’s a vicious cycle that can continue to spread more hate. And what if your own child, who has seen you like this, ends up in a situation where they are too afraid to tell you that the met someone they love just because of how it will make you feel or if you will approve.
In the end, we all have the right to be happy. We all should be able to share time with the people we love, whoever that is, to share a meal at home or at a restaurant with the biggest concern being, what are we going to eat or where are we going to go to eat and not to worry about what will others think…
💖💖Valentines dinner at home - Swedish meatballs dish with Hawaiian beer💖💖